Dear Family,
This week was by far the hardest, most painful, emotionally
draining week of my entire life. I have probably never hurt more in my entire
life, but I would say that I have at the same time never felt closer to our
Heavenly Father. He is with us through all of our trials. Every hard thing that
we are put through is for our benefit. Just a fair warning, this email is going
to be pretty long, so I am going to just say that I am sorry ahead of time.
Brace yourselves.
So it all started on Tuesday. We went out to work like
normal. Our first time was not until 4:30 so we had a few solid hours to tract.
We did good and found about 4 new families, and the day was off to a great
start. At about 4:15 we headed out to John and Mamitiana. I don't know if you
remember them, John was the drunk guy that took us home with him and has been
progressing ever since. He has been off of alcohol for about a month and he and
his family have been coming to church for even longer than that. Well on Saturday
we got there in the middle of the huge rainstorm and their four-year-old little
boy was sick. He had fallen in a hole and they weren't sure what was wrong with
him, so we were pretty worried. Then they didn't come to church on Sunday for
the first time in a long time. So we finally got out to their house on Tuesday
to see what was wrong and there was definitely something wrong. John came out
of the house and stumbled up to us and we could tell right away that he was
drunk. Very, very drunk. We walked him back inside and sat him and his wife
down to talk. It turns out that their little boy had gotten even worse. He had
lost a lot of weight and he didn't have much to lose in the first place. The
doctors didn't know what to do about it and they had all but lost hope. All of
this had been too much for poor John, and he had gone out drinking that
morning. As we sat there talking, he broke down and cried and just poured out
his heart to us. I picked him up and gave him a hug and we shared D&C
121:7-10 and I didn't think that I could understand that scripture any better
than I did at that moment. Well I was wrong. We left their home feeling a
little down that he had stumbled a little, but we all do sometimes and we were optimistic
that he would bounce back.
Straight from John we went to see a family. Their names are
Dina, Tsito, and their daughters Priscilla and Simila. Just a little background
before the story. When I got here Dina was about 9 months pregnant with Simila.
A couple of weeks after I got here she gave birth. Now Malagasy culture states
that when you have a baby you and the baby are not allowed to leave the house
for 2 months, which means that Dina could not come to church at the time. Tsito
was very, very much an alcoholic and really wasn't going anywhere, but we kept
visiting because Dina was such a sweet lady. About a month ago something
clicked with Tsito. He started reading the Book of Mormon, stopped drinking and
was doing great. This week little Simila finally turned 2 months old, and they
were finally going to be able to come to church, so we were very, very excited
for them, and so were they. On Tuesday we walked up to find a bunch of people
sitting around outside the house, which is never a good sign here in
Madagascar. We were then informed that only 30 minutes earlier, Simila had
passed away. We walked in to the dark little 10x8 candle lit hut to find the
two of them sitting on the bed, Dina clinging to Tsito as he slowly rocked
their lifeless little baby, and I physically felt my heart snap in two. We sat
down and talked for a moment about all that had happened. The baby had woken up
sick that morning, so at about noon Dina took her in to town to see the doctor.
I'm not sure exactly why, but she couldn't find one that was in, so she just
brought little Simila home. She put her on the bed for a moment and looked to
the Book of Mormon to calm her worries. After just a few minutes she looked up
to see Simila's eyes close and just like that she was gone. My whole soul ached
for them as I listened to this story. Then they pulled out a little dress to
put on her and explained that it was for her baptism the next month, but now
she would never be baptized. I could hear this mother's anguish as she thought
that her child was lost. I quickly grabbed the Book of Mormon and flipped to
the book of Moroni, chapter 8 verses 9-12 which explains how little children
need no baptism, for they are alive in Christ. I had to pause about halfway
through the verse because I could no longer see the page through my tears. I
finally finished and looked up, and in her eyes I could see just a glimmer of
hope for the first time since we had entered the house. She looked at me and
asked if that was really true, and my voice cracked as I told her that I knew
it was. I think that in that moment, for the first time in my life I knew
beyond even a shadow of a doubt that it was. I know that our Heavenly Father
was there with us in that dark little hut. He is always with us when we need
him the most. Sometimes we don't see him, but he is there.
By the time that we got out of Dina and Tsito's home it was
late but we had one more time with some members nearby who have become very
good friends of mine over the last couple of months. We walked in to their home
to see a couple of new faces! It was their daughter Karaza and her husband, who
had just driven up from Toliear. Toliear is in the very deep south of
Madagascar, about an 18 hour drive from Tana, sometimes even more. They had
rushed up because Karaza had been experiencing major stomach pains. After a
morning in the hospital they had learned that she had contracted appendicitis,
which would require surgery the following day. She had never had surgery before
and was super scared but also very much in pain. Her father was still at work,
but they had already talked to him and he thought it best that we give her a
blessing. I've done this plenty of times since being here but it still makes me
a little nervous every time. It's hard to try to step out of yourself and just
let the spirit take control. I know that's probably me and my little faith
talking, but that's always how I feel. I went through in my head the standard
stuff that you would say. Read your scriptures, go to church, be a good girl,
that kind of stuff. We laid our hands on her head and I started the blessing
and before I knew it I blessed her that because of her faith in a gospel that
she still didn't know (she's not a member) and because of her parents faith,
she would be fully healed. I think I even shocked myself at the boldness of the
statement. I finished out the blessing with the standard stuff and that was
that. We didn't see them again until Sunday.
Now Sunday is always the best day of the week by far, and
this week was a little bit sweeter. Karaza came with her family and told us
that they had done another scan at the hospital and it wasn't appendicitis,
just something minor, and they had her on medicine and she was feeling much
better at that point. Then came John and Mamitiana, sober and holding their
little boy who is doing much, much better now. We waited and waited until the
last second before the sacrament for Dina and Tsito, but finally had to go
inside as the doors shut for the sacrament. We sat there more than a little
disappointed that they hadn't come, but still very happy with John and Karaza.
Then, as the sacrament ended and the doors opened and I saw the most beautiful
sight that I have seen in my entire young life. Dina and Tsito came marching
right in and sat down next to us. Later that day, after church, I sat down with
John and we just talked. He wanted me to explain what the Temple was. I told
him that it was the House of God, the most beautiful place on earth. He asked
if I thought he would ever get there, and I told him that I knew he would. The
smile on that man's face made everything worth it. The Lord is completely and
totally aware of us at all times. He has been where we've been, faced what we've
faced, and stayed true through it all. He could take away the hard times if he
wanted, but that would eliminate the point. Yes, bad things happen to good
people. Bad things happen to make better good people. And the good news is, we
never have to face the bad things alone. I know that Christ lives, and loves
each and every one of us. I love you all so much,
Elder Jensen
Scripture of
the week: D&C 121: 7-10, D&C 122:8
